Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Funny mom stuff.

My friend, Christina sent these to me. I loved them!

A man came home fmm work and found his three
Children oubide, still
In their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty
Food boxes and wrappers
Strewn allaround the front yard.
The door of his wife's car was open, as was
The front door to the house
And there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding
Into the entry , he found
An even bigger mess. A lamp hd been knocked
Over, and the throw rug was
Wadded agai nst one wall.
In the front room the W was loudly blaring a
Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and
Various items d dothing.
In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink,
BreaKast food was spilled on the
Counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog
Food was spilled on the floor,
a broken glass lay under the table, and a
Small pile of sand was spread
By the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over
Toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was
She might be ill, or that
Some$ing serious had happened.
He was met with a small trickle of water as it
Made its way out the bathroom door.
As he peered inside he found wet towels,
Scummy soap and more t oys
Stewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a
Heap and toothpaste had been
Smearcd over the mirror and walls.
As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife
Still curled up in the bed
In her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up
At him, smiled, and asked how his day went.
He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What
Happened here today?'
She again smiled and answered,'You know every
Day when you come home
From work and you ask me what in the world I do all
'Yes,n was his incredulous reply
She ansrvercd, 'Well, today I didn't do it,"


Jenny's husband, Charley, was a male chauvinist. Even though they both worked full-time, he never helped around the house. Housework was woman's work!
But one evening Jenny arrived home from work to find the children bathed one load of clothes in the washer and another in the dryer, dinner on the stove, and the table set. She was astonished--something's up.
It turns out that Charley had read an article that said wives who worked full-time and had to do their own housework were too tired to be romantic. The night went well and the next day she told her office friends all about it.
"We had a great dinner. Charley even cleaned up. He helped the kids do their homework, folded all the laundry and put everything away. I really enjoyed the evening."
"But what about afterward?" asked her friends.
"Oh, that was perfect too. Charley was too tired!"

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